Sanitizing and Justifying Bondage

In my porning I come across “clean bondage” sites — I say “clean” because they’re kind of sanitized. They’re clean people in very nice dungeons, with very professional lighting and camera angles. This isn’t a series snapped from a phone on some drunken night where you piece it together the next day like in The [...]

“Victim” — more brutal than kinky

I watched a movie last night called “Victim” that had lots of rape, domination, transgendered themes, and just about as much kink as you can shove into 90 minutes without actually being a porno. I’m going to reveal just about every twist and turn about this so if you want to watch it don’t read [...]

Sexy Pretend Time and Reality

I read a great blog a while back about a woman who’s boyfriend had a Domme come over to dominate her. Apparently the Domme came in and laid down the rules, things like, “You will call me Mistress” to which the girlfriend said, “Um. No.” And laughed. Poor Domme had no control, and honestly, hadn’t [...]

The availability of kink

We all have different facets of our personality that we show different people — the woman who’s a dirty sex toy with her lover can also be a manager of a successful company. The good father might be an e dropping raver on the weekends. We all have extremes, and we know who we can [...]

Dracula — the Ultimate Dom

Went to a small production of Dracula last night… By small, I mean the theater was maybe as big as an oversized shipping container with about 40 people in the audience on either side of the “stage” — really just an area about 10-15 wide between the two rows of people. But it was a [...]

Forced Empathy… sort of

I posted a blog the other day called Making you a slave to my pleasure… and I think I need to make a little clarification. This was a mental exercise in taking a bit of scientific research to a possible, and possibly frightening, invention. The idea that one person could completely dominate another with transmitting [...]

Women who say, “You Trained Him Well” need to be trained

I don’t know how many times have I heard a woman say, “You trained him well…” Just because I help a woman with her coat, doesn’t mean that I was “trained” to do it like a lapdog is trained to dance in circles at her command. I swear, one of these days I’m going to [...]

BDSMers: Why is Vanilla Bad?

My closest Twitter friends and I all seem to keep talking about BDSM culture. We haven’t talked much about PVC and ball-gags, covered ways to tie knots that restrain without chafing, or possibly tying the ones that DO chafe intentionally. We haven’t covered hot wax on the nipples, or alternating ice and heat. Hell, we [...]

Comfort Food — Tying her up and beating her isn’t the issue…

I read @kitty_thomas‘s book, Comfort Food this weekend. I found it a little disturbing, not because of the obvious BDSM theme, but because of how it made me think about society in a broader sense. I’m sure it will spur other blogs (I’ve got one in my drafts folder called You’re just Tits and Pussy) [...]