Keys to Her Heart

It started a few years ago — she gave me a key to her house. Just the knob for the front door, the deadbolt is keyed differently, so if she wanted to keep me out, she could just throw the bolt. For awhile I kept it on a separate keyring which I would grab if [...]

Aware of being drunk

There’s this disconnected feeling I get at some point during a night of drinking… Sort of an autopilot sensation that my body and my conversation have gone on without my conscious oversight and that I’m playing catch up with myself. Let’s see… Fiona came home and needed to unwind, so we went to the pub. [...]

Something about Feet

I never understood foot fetishes. I mean, I love a woman in stockings (I think pantyhose are a little ugly with that tab from the reinforced crotch running up her butt, but if I’m just seeing her legs, it doesn’t matter). I love a woman in fuck-me-pumps, with that arch to her foot and showing [...]

Sanitizing and Justifying Bondage

In my porning I come across “clean bondage” sites — I say “clean” because they’re kind of sanitized. They’re clean people in very nice dungeons, with very professional lighting and camera angles. This isn’t a series snapped from a phone on some drunken night where you piece it together the next day like in The [...]

Wandering into an Adult Friend Finder Hookup

My buddy Don and I started drinking early that day… Well, actually, Don and his office manager started drinking REALLY early and I just kind of caught up in time to… well, catch up. The were at this dive bar near Don’s office that has an amazing selection of whiskeys — fill your card with [...]

The Opposite of Pretty Girl Syndrome

Yesterday I presented my theory on Pretty Girl Syndrome where a girl not only uses her looks to get what she wants, but eventually falls into the trap of not having and skills except manipulation with sex. It’s not really a new theory — Hollywood always has the snotty cheerleader or spoiled princess who finds [...]

Pretty girl syndrome

There’s a physical syndrome that stunts girls potential — I call it “pretty girl syndrome.” Girls who never learn how to do anything because they’re just too pretty… Girls who will always need the help of a rich boyfriend or husband because their handicap keeps them from ever being able to change a light bulb [...]

The Perfect Gooddump Fan Photo

She’s not a fan, hell, she doesn’t even follow me on twitter, but if anyone has a profile photo that says, “I love Gooddump” better than this, I’d love to see it. I have to wonder… is the woman in the photo shocked by something she sees in the toilet, embarrassed to be caught in [...]

Gratuitous Nudity

I like casual nudity… There’s something extra intimate about watching her do simple things naked — despite the name of my blog, I’m not into schizer videos (shit is not a sex toy) but watching a woman take a piss is somehow a warm fuzzy intimate moment (emotionally warm and fuzzy, I’m not into golden [...]

My Neighbor Likes it When I Mow

My neighbor is a single mom. She seems nice enough, but she’s always at arm’s length — I don’t know, it’s probably some kind of trust thing and being a tall, kind of loud, a little arrogant, and definitively opinionated guy, I’m sure I fall into a “not to be trusted” category. And that’s probably [...]